You know those moments when you just realise something? Those moments where it feels like you’ve been hit by a bolt of lightning, and suddenly everything seems to be clearer? I recently had one of those moments, where I realised that I’ve always been my own worst enemy.
I’m sure it’s something we’ve all experienced, and something we can relate to – causing problems and making things more difficult for yourself than they would ever need to be.
Sometimes it can be quite minor things. Like leaving things to the last-minute, so that you end up in a rush. Or planning on getting a good night’s sleep, but binge watching Gilmore Girls on Netflix until 3am. But being your own worst enemy also comes with some major issues, some of which are actually quite damaging.
It’s these bigger issues which I want to talk about.
I’ve always been a bit of a negative person, and it’s something I’m quite comfortable with. But I’m starting to realise how much I’m blocking myself, and how my attitude and focus is so detrimental to my own development and progress in life.
Like most people, I question my own success. Am I doing well? Am I as good as everyone else? Am I going anywhere? But the problem is that I’ve been spending all my time focusing on the issues I’m having, rather than dealing with what’s actually causing them.
That’s how I’ve come to realise that I’m my own worst enemy. Rather than driving my own success by pushing myself, I’ve been questioning whether I’m good enough. Instead of celebrating my successes, I compare myself to people who are totally different.
I guess I’ve started to realise that I don’t actually believe in myself, or value my achievements.
Everything becomes a lot easier when you sit on the outside of your life and try to place blame elsewhere. But sometimes you need to do the difficult thing and take an introspective look at yourself. Coming to terms with your own self-worth is always a challenge, but when you realise that you are at the root of a lot of your own issues, as well as every single one of your successes, you see life differently.
Life doesn’t move at a set pace for everyone. If you want to be successful, you’ve got to work hard. If you want something, you need to fight for it. Sometimes people will reach certain points and goals before you, but they’re on a different path to you – and you can’t base your life on theirs.
So from now on I’m taking a different approach. I’m done with being my own worst enemy, and standing in the way of my own success.
It’s time for me to be the change that I need in my own life.